Last uni semester our writing class was tasked with putting together a folio of writing tasks based off a series of prompts, a different one for each week. This prompt was to rewrite a weather report they gave us into any genre we chose, I chose to write 200 words of a comedians speech.

---

Look here, there’s something which really frustrates me about science in Australia, and it’s not the fact that they are telling us the world is doomed, because it most certainly is doomed, it is the lack of belief Australia has in that fact. No, seriously. I was talking to a Sciencey friend the other day – yes that’s what I call her – I’m Comedy, and she’s Sciencey, together we make the state of our climate: apparently an absolute joke.

Seasonal temperatures are steadily rising and look at us…most of us are sitting around laughing.

I kid you not! I was walking from the station to do this show and I had to take off my coat because I was too hot…it’s August!

When I asked my Sciencey friend about this she says to me, ‘there is to be a shift in weather conditions to something a lot warmer than the normal, and it doesn’t seem to want to stop.’

‘What even is normal?’ I ask, and from the perspective of this scienceless mind, what would you expect? You know what she replied?

‘Look at these two south eastern Australia temperature maps, they’ll explain everything.’

Did I mention I failed high school science?